Oh ... Really?

Category: Humor

Wednesday, February 02, 2011

Pragmatic Project Management

One of our clients is getting ready to make some upgrades in their implementation of the product we support. Prior to making these changes, they have analyzed all of the issues they have experienced, and with our assistance, found either resolutions or work-arounds and created an action plan. This particular bullet point struck us as rather amusing ...

5. Delay in execution of Report

a. Risk: Execution of reports have a long delay the 1st time you go into this module. Subsequent reports do not have a delay.

b. Cause: Report Logic and data is being cached into memory during the 1st report execution.

c. Work Around: Train staff on how to be patient. The report will run, but it may take a few minutes before you see the results.


We are hoping that they can share this particular training plan with us.


Posted by LissaKay on 02/02/11 at 08:26 PM in ~ Humor
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Monday, November 22, 2010

I want your text, baby ... or very serious undertakings

So, two of Rich's daughters are expecting baby girls within a few weeks of each other this coming winter. They decided to have their baby shower together, today, while the out of town sister was here for Thanksgiving. We've been crazy busy with the bathroom renovation and generally getting the house ready for the holidays, and I hadn't had time to shop. So, I went today on my lunch break ... and sent a text to Rich to let him know that I did so.

I'm thinking our communication skills are a bit .... lacking ..
Me: I went shopping on my lunch hour ...

Him: What did you get?

Me: Just a few little things

Him: Like ... ?

Me: VERY little things

Him: Like ... ?

Me: Like ... little pink things

Him: 😊

(Can you see where this is going yet?)

Me: Like ... little tiny, soft pink things with bows and flowers and frilly stuff that makes grown women go SQUEEEE!!!

Him: How about grown men???

Me: Well, the ones around here (My team is all men, 'cept me, of course) generally went "Hmmmphf!"

Me: A couple rolled their eyes

Him: ????

(At this point, I knew we definitely had a failure to communicate ... )

Me:

(A number of minutes go by ... )

Me: What the heck were you thinking???

Him: Lacy frilly undertakings!

Him: Underthings!

Him: I hate predictive text

Me: (After picking myself up off the floor, wiping the tears from my eyes and catching my breath ... ) Well, either one works ...



Posted by LissaKay on 11/22/10 at 04:39 PM in ~ Home Life ~ Humor
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Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Totally Half-Baked

If you enjoy the razor sharp wit and snark of the gals at Go Fug Yourself, and laugh hysterically at the LOLCatz and LOLDogz, then you are in for a real treat (heh!) ...


Cake Wrecks ... When professional cakes go horribly, hilariously wrong ... is a relatively new (first posts in May 2008) blog that collects and displays pictures of cakes that are just ... not quite right.

A bride gets punk'd? Could be ... she ordered a cake that looks like this, only in all white with green accents:

image


But what she really got was not exactly a replica ... or even close. It is barely recognizable as a cake:

image


There are lots more ... keep scrolling, and laughing.

I know that I will be very, very careful of where I get my wedding cake!

Posted by LissaKay on 09/10/08 at 06:13 PM in ~ Humor
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Wednesday, July 02, 2008

A Public Service Announcement

Please ... for the love of Mother Earth and all Humanity, avoid crass materialism! Don't run ourselves off of our own planet!










Posted by LissaKay on 07/02/08 at 04:42 PM in ~ Humor
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Tuesday, April 01, 2008

What I do instead of studying

I am supposed to be studying ... writing a research paper for my American Government class. I have been distracted by YouTube once again. It's a sickness, I tell you! I watch one after another and on and on ...

But this one is just too cute ... I loves me some Muppets!



Are you tapping your toes yet? 😜


Posted by LissaKay on 04/01/08 at 05:57 PM in ~ Humor
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I’m Worth More than I Thought!

This seems an appropriate post topic for the day ...



toys
Powered By Shop for Toys


Go on ... give it a try and see what you're worth!


(via ... who's worth only $1148 ... Heh!)
Posted by LissaKay on 04/01/08 at 03:09 PM in ~ Humor
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Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Yoga ... for Zombies?

You have no idea how hard it is pretending to rot and fall apart while holding a good plank pose. — Posted by Mike HERE

OK, now I am as serious about my yoga practice as the next person ... in that I try hard to get maximum benefit from it, while putting forth my best effort. It is paying off quite nicely, I might add. But I am not so serious that I can't also laugh and enjoy myself. Indeed, it is a rare class where someone does not giggle at some point or another. One of my favorite instructors also happens to have a fabulous sense of humor, and her classes always have us laughing.

So, I found this to be rather amusing:

Have you ever wished you could do downward dog with a decomposing body? Well, City Room hasn’t (doing the crow with an intact body is still an insurmountable challenge), but this combination apparently has been a niche fantasy with some population of New Yorkers.

About 75 people showed up in Williamsburg’s East River State Park for an (online) open casting call for the filming of a yoga zombie video on Sunday. “The zombie blogs were only mildly interested in it, it was the yoga blogs,” said Jason Wishnow, the director of the video.


The video is to promote The Zen of Zombie: Better Living Through the Undead. The response to the casting call on yoga blogs was overwhelmingly positive, enthusiastic and excited. So there you have it ... not everyone that's into yoga is a patchoulli-drenched, all-organic, herb-sprinkling, humorless hippie. Even zombies can get into it!

The yoga corpse pose, or Shivasana, is uh, ... dead simple to do. But if you need detailed instruction, you can watch a video demonstration of the technique. Just don't hurt yourself, mmkay?

Posted by LissaKay on 10/16/07 at 01:12 AM in ~ Humor
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Friday, June 22, 2007

On the cusp of the weekend

OK folks, here it is ... real simple like - PPP != 911


Yes, indeed ... piss poor planning on your part does not equal an emergency on mine. Mmmk?

So, at 4:45 on a Friday afternoon, when you discover that adding a new user to your workflow so that they can manage invoices while you're on a month-long vacation that starts in 15 minutes isn't working quite right, you do not have the right to yell at the IT support people and make like it's all their fault that it isn't working and you can't leave yet, and insist on also yelling at their manager, and the manager's manager, that it simply must be escalated to the highest of priority, and the server support team must be called in to work your issue RIGHT NOW and the whole IT department is completely incompetent because no one knows anything about your obscure little web application and why you can't set up security rights for another user ...

Now it's 10 after 5, I contemplate my gym bag and the step-aerobics class that starts in 15 minutes which I desperately need as I recall the mushroom-swiss cheeseburger, fried cheese poppers, potato chips, buttered popcorn, orange chicken, lo mein, crab rangoons and fried ice cream that were consumed this week, plus the stress of preparing for a big statistics exam tonight, and I file your ticket, email the support team that your *issue* simply must be taken care of RIGHT NOW, thank you for calling have a nice day, lock the computers, log out, hit the elevators and, beeyotch you just ceased to exist cause for at least the next hour and a half it's all about ME ...

Oh ... and then I get home after my class, rinse off the sweat, heat up leftover Chinese because despite being a bad girl all week, I have still managed to lose two more pounds, and post about this while I eat ... and as I type the last sentence of the above paragraph, Firefox crashes, but I restore the session and all the tabs come back, including the form text I have been typing! FIREFOX REWLZ!

Posted by LissaKay on 06/22/07 at 08:43 PM in ~ Humor
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Sunday, May 06, 2007

Justin Timberlake - Eat your, um ... heart out

This is the result of having nothing much to do except surf around and find weird things on the intarwebs ...



This is wrong. So wrong. So very, very wrong.

But still hilarious ...




I will never be able to go to the GYN again without busting a gut ...

BusyMom will love this one, as evidenced here and here ... oh yeah, and she's a nurse too.


Posted by LissaKay on 05/06/07 at 01:54 AM in ~ Humor
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Tuesday, April 03, 2007

LOLOMGLMAOROFLBRBIMHOBBQATMPDQ!!

I have seriously never laughed so hard as I did at the lolcats (with tags! for your convenience!) at I Can Has Cheezburgers?

My inner 12 year old boy (nodz to BusyMom, who proudly embraces hers, when not spanking him) cackled, laughed, chortled, guffawed, snorted and had tears rollin' while browsing this site. It is not work safe, only because your colleagues and boss will be convinced that you have lost your mind.

Enjoy. But do so without beverages. :coolsmile:

Posted by LissaKay on 04/03/07 at 01:33 AM in ~ Humor
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